A sane recompilation of lessons and guidelines I’ve learnt from the women I’ve dated

Not all of them omg, but like there are some who really showed me a whole new world and a better approach to everything,yes everything.

So this is for me to have a proper understanding and to ponder on, you may or may not understand reader, and that is ok haha. I won’t recap on L, she did show me ALL or I think a major handful of things that I do NOT want in a relationship, like ever again, I am thankful cos I wouldn’t know without having experienced first hand. She even told me once she could be a “step” towards something much better… Damn she was so,so,so right, so thanks for that,really thanks. I even learnt to break up with someone,well I didn’t do it right the first time…but I know better now.

So,from there we have Val, she..she was the first girl to treat me the way I want girls to treat me, being nice and gentleman like towards me, no, it doesn’t mean I wanna be super spoiled and stuff but yeah it was nice,so I’m not going to settle down for anything less than that, the only thing missing was time,she was super busy and well honestly I can be kinda pushy ( working on it ) so I kinda clinged onto her too much, hehe sorry bout that,but again,she was real and honest and we ended well, we aren’t friends,I don’t become friends with girls I was girlfriend with or even date, but it was ok, I learnt something very valuable.

And then we have H, oh my H, she showed me dates can actually be a lot of fun, that there are people out there who will ask you out and dye your hair, share chocolate with ya and share a commitment to something {even if it’s diametrically opposed to what you are committed to and yet it won’t cause a problem ( Paleo – Vegan haha ) } also to working out, I definitely want a girl who likes working out you know, MMA, crossfit,weight lifting,all of the above ,it is important to me so yeah, wanna have that in common. And she also showed me that,  cute good looking beautiful girls can like me as well,  I wouldn’t of dreamed to even talk to her a few months ago you know? So way outta my league I would of thought, and guess what? No such a thing,so well self esteem boost + 10 haha, that was really really nice. Also she was kinda a busy person but still had time,so it can be done. Too bad it didn’t progress further but oh well, there’s more time than life.

So little by little I’m finding out new things I like,few I don’t and I am polishing myself to be ready for a special girly who will show up randomly sometime haha,oh right she must NOT have EX issues..that’s the one thing lol.

I can’t, I can’t not write about KT, you know she’s been THE ex ,and will forever be,now in a much more positive light of course. Ahh damn I was so so mad at her, but we both fucked up so , she did show me I can dream big, I mean, I freaking went to  Germany right? I did it! And she was my first love…aww how cute is that? Now that I think about it…she’s been the only one. Also she was the first authentic original super pretty girlfriend I had, man she was so good looking ,well she is , haven’t seen pics..hmm but I bet she is, so well things got a lil messy but in the end,after years, literal years, I came to the understanding that it wasn’t a bad thing,we were young and silly but hey, I do have nice memories … am I getting teary eyes? stupid hormones… haha,so yeah, I also learnt I must be more considerate with the other person, not so clingy and drama free,which i am now..tsk a bit late I guess. But I do wanna go visit again say hi and stuff, can’t die without going to Deutschland again at least once.

I’m feeling happy , I am truly amazed I could write this haha, I wouldn’t dream of this some years ago,so thanks girls for showing me there’s more to life than the stuff I have had before…I’m gonna keep working on my mind and body and well, when I meet ( or meet again ) someone special who is right for me and I’m right for her hooray, in the meantime, there’s lots of books to be read and workouts to be done haha.

-deep happy sigh- Dafuq , a big hug and meow.


A different view on relationships

Well… I’ve been constantly changing, towards the better,for the last… huh.. 2 years? And now it’s the turn for a very rooted and ancient view of mine to be challenged,questioned and ultimately put to test!!

I’m a very stubborn person,but I’m also open to change, ha! so… I used to think that having a partner in a relationship, like a girlfriend, would automatically mean that you’d get to spend most of the time with that person,being in touch a lot, seeing each other daily or quite often,talking on the Facebook,Whats’app and what not,also that she would meet your friends, cos everyone’s friends want to know their friend’s girlfriend ne? ( that bit was confusing,hope you got it lol ) and also telling your friends lots of things about your current relation, ups and downs.

Guess what? While it might be the norm or probably the way most people do it, it may not be the best way, at least it’s not the only way!! Seeing each other daily does not guarantee quality time nor strengthened feelings , you can take my word for it . Also, whereas the saying  “out of mind out of sight” might be a reality,  this is only true to an extent, cause, the best friends you have or people you really care for, you don’t HAVE to see often to keep those feelings strong, ( if you do, you may wanna check it out and do some hard thinking ) and it’s also true that one valuates more that which isn’t the easiest to attain.  I wanna say it’s not the same to have someone that you can see every single freaking day,  talk on the phone and stuff ( case A ) , that someone who doesn’t have as much time and you can meet say, once a week or less ( case B ). You’d wanna make the most of it right? Not to say you don’t with the case A ,but let’s be honest, it becomes a bit less exciting as time goes by. Also easy comes easy goes, not that it has to be a major struggle to be worth it…but the fact you gotta make an effort makes it much more rewarding.

So…on the friends note… I never stopped to think why was it important to me that my current girlfriend was at least an acquaintance  of my buddies, it is fun to go out all together but… in the end you risk that your girlfriend prefers to be with your friends or that she’ll only wanna meet with you if it’s a group thing, no friends no going out. You do NOT want this to happen, trust me. Also it’s not like we need friend’s approval, I usually don’t like my friend’s partners but it’s the same cos it’s none of my business ( unless they are real assholes, then I make it clear that’s not ok ) and finally, it’s not a good idea to tell your friends about your problems with your lover cause, when these stop or get better they will be suspicious or still be mad ( cos when you tell these problems you are all boohoo and whiny ) so it’s best to keep couple things , between two people , which are the ones dating .

Ah, almost forgot… there’s a song saying “Racing so hard you know it won’t last” maybe we do rush into this lover binge and wanna take,see,know all about that person,way too fast and way too soon. A slow pace might be ideal for more lasting, balanced, healthy relationships.


I liked this image, lol, so here it goes. so my conclusions are:

1.- Keep couple things between the freaking couple

2.- This of course means the troubles you might face.

3.- More isn’t necessary better, so any time you get to spend together, spend it the best possible way!

4.- Don’t just think things should be done this way or the other, not every pair of jeans fit the same .

5.- Enjoy your time alone, your time with friends, your time with your partner and see that it’s not a must to mix those 3.

6.- Like a wonderful song / Maybe by Marlango / says “Take the beginning with no end in mind” relationships do end, everything kinda does, but who knows when will this happen, let us rejoice on the now,future may never come,for all we know.

Mare , Girlfriends . Latest Yuri Manga readings

Ok…first… dafuq did I just read…second,awww so cute…not the same manga title of course… that’d be incredibly disturbing…

Well for once, I got into reading yuri manga..cos..well I like it and haven’t read it in a while…for a while I mean like one freakin week. First I read..


This title is sweet,and funny,you have the typical school life, slice of life, popular girl approaches shy girl,they become super friends,shy girl falls for popular one,but oh how could they…? if they are both girls ( If I listen to that or read it once more, Imma die ) eventually it works out and it’s pretty fucking sweet.



…must come from nightmare…the fuck was that…this..witch/demon whatever girl,is like going around finding people with negative feelings,sinners or some crap,and then she summons these…hmm servants/demons who eat them…we got some dudes who gang rape this poor girl,this girl who had an abortion,this horny girl…and some others, the girl who got gang raped becomes… “friends” of some sort with Mare,Mae, what’s her name .  there’s..random sex..sex magic…people about to die and people being alive weird sex… It’s… interesting .

The rest was oneshots, Prism was a whole story about a girl and her first love,who was a girl,but she thought was a boy,then they meet again and ya know.  Cutesy all around…except for the weird demon/witch rape/crazy sex  based previous one…it’s interesting tho…kinda depressing..ok a lot.


E-e-e-every day I’m shuffling!!

…I have absolutely no good reason to use that as a title..then again who cares, Imma tell you who does not… Me!

So…lots of things have been happening lately, I’ve got like 10 movies waiting for me…mostly  asian horror and some random comedy, I’m kinda waiting to watch them tho…maybe waiting for someone to watch them with.. Anyway, days have been hectic  lately!! Say last 2 weeks really

First… I dunno if I mentioned it before, but I’m like.. almost completely sure ( say 99.9.9% ) that girls ( at least the ones living in my city ) cannot be faithful, well wait, some in other nearby towns don’t seem to be able either… anyhow , I am sincerely impressed at how things are, I’m sure things have always been like that… but when I was younger at the gay scene.. well I really didn’t see as many things, then again I knew like 4 lesbians not freaking 40+ … The first thing I noticed is most people favor this ” eggs in ALL the baskets” trend..

I’m not saying just cos you like someone she’s gonna be your forever love one and only, but come on gals, cut me some slack!! How can you “like” 2,4,10 girls at the same time!! At least for me… I take many things into account to like someone… and it’s so odd and hard for people to hmm, get my attention.. and like for real, for me to be interested and wanting to date them,think about them…all that corny stuff… I can’t possibly imagine having this with more than ONE girl… what I think happens is these girls don’t wanna be alone or want easy-access sex or some shit and therefore they have secret supplies.. Yano what bothers me most is most of the time they are not even sincere… like “hey ,I’m dating 3 other girls ok?” Then people could decide if they wanna “be in line” or not… Jesus…

Then this chick…ughh!! She… We went out few times and bla bla, she has an amazing girlfriend, like seriously cool, and, in my opinion, way too pretty for her, and yet she is quite silly and goes and does things she shouldn’t… or gets angry over most stupid things ever… I had to find it so amusing when she told me she wanted to kiss me and I was like … “Ehm 1.- You have a gf, and we get along well and 2.- I am getting to know this girl and I really really like her…” and she’s like “Well,you aren’t girlfriends yet! “… Really? For reals? GEEE people! I dunno if I should tell the other girl or not…cos even if nothing happened,I’m good pushing people away,literally and figuratively, I feel kinda bad about such disrespect.. good thing is the gf does know and is aware of how that girl is… what I don’t understand is what is she doing there . pfff women

My soundtrack right now is a mix of “Pumped up kicks” by Foster the people which I heard just yesterday on a friend’s radio… I think it’s about shooting kids…DAFUQ?.. rhythm    is nice tho ¬¬ and this TV show about eating disorders and abused people and what not..  yes that’s my deal at this time…

Now on other things… there’s this girl… I dunno, I think she has way too many things in her head, we have been speaking  for about  2 weeks now I think, I like her a lot…like for good, but hmm I kinda wanna let her make up her mind or like order things or something, she sent cute messages today ^^ oh, yes, cos I’ve been sick as fuck,all dizzy,my head aches so bad…eyes are watery..my throat is sore,so is my nose and I think I slept like 16 hours…still sorta sleepy, this is actually hurting my eyes but it was driving me fucking nuts… I was happy to get her messages..Hmm,we’ll see, not gonna get too excited yet° Think Imma lay down and continue dying in slow agony,yeh!

That is how I feel

I’m sure the previous picture and I.. look similar

¬¬ those silly girls getting girlfriends,and me, I’d be an awesome girlfriend fuck sake!!

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